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Lonely in Florida

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Turkeytop
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Joined: Mon Aug 16, 2010 9:27 pm

Lonely in Florida

Post by Turkeytop » Sat Feb 20, 2021 10:43 pm

Florida man caught masturbating in Walmart parking lot told cops he was ‘lonely’

A man who was arrested for masturbating in the parking lot of a Florida Walmart told police he took matters into his own hands because he missed his girlfriend.

The indecent incident happened Wednesday in Vero Beach, according to a police report obtained by The Smoking Gun.

Cops were called after a shopper noticed the suspect’s self-love session inside a Kia parked outside the store.

According to the tipster, the Walmart wanker had the driver’s side window down, and was performing the highly visible lewd act in broad daylight.

Arriving officers said they found hard evidence of 26-year-old Kyle Weiss’ guilt.

“I noticed that he had an obvious erection protruding in his shorts,” a cop noted in the report.

Weiss initially told police he was at Walmart because he is an Uber eats driver, but choked under further questioning.

He eventually confessed he was performing a sex act on himself because “he is lonely as his ex-girlfriend is in Colorado,” the police report states.

The Denver resident told police he did not realize he “could be seen playing with himself.”

Weiss was arrested for exposure of sexual organs and disorderly conduct and released on $1,000 bond, according to the police document.
https://nypost.com/2021/02/19/florida-m ... rking-lot/


500


I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.

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Bryce
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Re: Lonely in Florida

Post by Bryce » Sat Feb 20, 2021 10:56 pm

Very creative writing. Nice double entendre throughout. Of course, if Rush Limbaugh would have said the same things about this guy on his radio show, he would have been accused of cock shaming or some silly thing.

Well, unless the guy was a fat Republican.


New York and Chicago were all in with respect to their sanctuary status — until they were hit with the challenge of actually providing sanctuary. In other words, typical liberal hypocrisy.

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Turkeytop
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Re: Lonely in Florida

Post by Turkeytop » Sun Feb 21, 2021 12:02 am

He tried to pull a fast one and got caught.


I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.

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TC Talks
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Re: Lonely in Florida

Post by TC Talks » Sun Feb 21, 2021 8:51 am

Turkeytop wrote:
Sun Feb 21, 2021 12:02 am
He tried to pull a fast one and got caught.
apparently not fast enough


“The more you can increase fear of drugs, crime, welfare mothers, immigrants and aliens, the more you control all of the people.”
― Noam Chomsky

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MotorCityRadioFreak
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Location: Warren, MI

Re: Lonely in Florida

Post by MotorCityRadioFreak » Mon Feb 22, 2021 5:50 am

It's a Florida Wal-Mart, who is honestly surprised?


They/them, non-binary and proud.

Remember that “2000 Mules” was concocted by a circus of elephants.
The right needs to stop worry about what’s between people’s legs. Instead, they should focus on what’s between their ears.
Audacity sucks.

kc8yqq
Posts: 170
Joined: Tue Oct 30, 2018 6:15 am

Re: Lonely in Florida

Post by kc8yqq » Mon Feb 22, 2021 6:43 am

Anybody want to buy a used Kia?



Deleted User 14896

Re: Lonely in Florida

Post by Deleted User 14896 » Mon Feb 22, 2021 9:05 am

kc8yqq wrote:
Mon Feb 22, 2021 6:43 am
Anybody want to buy a used Kia?
The Kia comes with a fore stroke.



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